Special Needs Land hits most of us really hard, I know. I experienced it myself. My special needs son was not born typically but came by Cesarean.
Further, when they pulled him out of my womb, he collapsed and went straight to oxygen. Then he went to NICU for two weeks. His medical equipment filled the living room when he came home with a genetic diagnosis.
Yet, when I chose his name, it was before I knew that he was a special needs baby.
Gift of God just sounded right.
My son's older brother at the age of 5 had prayed for a baby brother, and God gave him one. I knew I wanted another baby, but I was not sure if I was too old to get pregnant.
Yet, along came my son, Gift of God.
He was a challenge, but always a gift, even before he was born.
They told me he would just sit and watch tv
While television sure is a favorite pastime of many, it really does not have anything to do with who my son is today.
But, the point is we were told many things like this that limited my son to a behavior that had little to nothing to do with who he is as a person.
My son is a gift of God because he is a creation of God.
He holds likes, interests, and activities that define who he is. Plus, he loves to go places and do things, which of course, do not have anything to do with television!
Do we run up against the wall of his genetic syndrome? Yep, you bet. But, I always encourage him to be who he is and encourage him in his interests, even as he grows and changes.
In truth, his tantrums and meltdowns are far worse than I imagined (being honest here). The professionals who were/are supposed to help us, often times fail to do that. And the system is one big pile of corruption.
But, when I look at my son, receive his hugs and sloppy kisses, or listen to his childlike banter (even as a big kid), I know that I am blessed.
The bad days are just that.
They are just bad days.
It is really hard to remember that when things are really dark and we cannot find a solution for whatever issue burdens our special needs kid.
I read the posts too of so many moms struggling under the weight of what it takes to care for our kids, and many of us do it alone. Some moms are even married and shoulder this burden alone. When we are honest, we are that mom too. She is a reflection of who we are as well.
So, at the end of the day, or even during a rough season, just take small moments to breathe in scripture, a hot bath, or an extra nap. Take the moments you can to refresh and regroup.
Remember that this season, too, will be over and better days are tomorrow or on the horizon.
It is really not over until God says so!
God has a plan
Yep. He really does, and that includes your special needs angel (who may not always act like an angel).
One thing I know for sure is that He created our children and then placed them here in our families for a purpose and a reason.
It is one of the reasons why I started writing (which is one of my own personal calls by the Lord), but He also has a unique plan for both our special needs kids and our typical kids.
Watch them. Watch how they play and talk to each other. Look for the ways they positively interact with each other and their peers.
Nurture it and support their God-given attributes. God's purpose and plan remain in the middle of these little nuggets of our kids' personalities.
Further, what is His plan for you as a mom and a woman of God? What is the Lord trying to teach you? Has He called you to prayer or some service to your family?
If you are not sure, ask Him and He will unfold the truth right before you.
You are not alone
I think this is where yes, our faith comes in, but also where we rely on each other for support.
There are so many special needs groups on Facebook, and I know if you are like me, you joined several of them!
The things we all have in common are our special needs kids, the long hours, difficult medical issues, behavioral challenges, learning difficulties, and then the rest of our duties as moms and sometimes wives.
While we may have specific challenges as individuals, generally, it is all about our special needs kids some days.
The unique challenges punctuate our daily lives while we struggle with being unable to go places or make a quick run to the store. Further, shuttling and caring for our typical kids and their needs remains a rather large task when you are the only one running the ship.
But, after the storm of the day, or even before it starts, God is there, waiting for you to listen to Him.
He is the still, small voice in the peace and He is the Word on the pages of our Bibles. His Holy Spirit is what leads and guides you through each and every decision.
Whether you are alone physically or married, He is always with you and will help you every step of the way.
While we may not have been given the easy lives as special needs moms, we are blessed with a Mighty God who knows everything that we need.
In His grip~Kim
